NOOOO! not again. my brother tested positive for morphine when he returned to his school from his home visit. i wonder how the school deals with these things--i know he doesn't get kicked out (obviously). will he be punished by not receiving the next phase in the program? who knows....

my first reaction after reading the email from my mom was to scream. i just want to get in his face and tell him how stupid he's being. that won't work. it didn't before...see, in early august, i was at home and got a phone call from his school saying that he was not there--was he sick and at home? no. i walked around the issue, not knowing for sure if he was at an appointment or something. i called a parent to see...he was skipping. i went to the school when it let out because i knew he would be there to pick up my step-sister. i parked in the lot and when he drove up i drove over to him. he got out of his car and walked over to my open window. the car was immediately filled w/the smell of alcohol. i told him to get in his car and sit there till i got back. i took my step-sister home and had a brief talk with her about how the morning developed. it ends up that he picked up some "thuggish" guy for school. i went back to the school and told him to get in the car with me. he wanted to follow me home in his car. i gave him a blank, you dumbass-type stare and he got in my car. i yelled at him forever it seemed. he cried. i cried. we went home after the LONG drive/talk around town. he cleaned up for about a week only to run his car through the doors of a gas-station as a result of using an inhalent.

what do i do? how can i help? he's getting the treatment; he's got a loving family. it's getting to the point where i'm giving up on him. am i going to have to take care and worry about him my entire life? for his short life??--i guess this might be a better way to phrase it...

i'm going biking to clear my head.