i am feeling refreshed today.

thoughts have finally been allowed to catch up with me. the past two days have been spent resting, reading, watching movies, listening to music--all with incense burning. i seem to have lost that time that i need so badly...that time to recenter

things that are on my mind:

brooke.
she disappoints me. i disappoint myself. why aren't we talking? i feel like she needs me right now and i am not there for her. should i be there for her? after all that she put me through? this song captivates my feelings about her:

am i faithful
am i strong
am i good enough to belong
in your reverie a perfect girl
your vision of romance is cruel
and all along i played the fool
all your expectations bury me
dont worry
you will find the answer
if you let it go
give yourself some time to falter
but dont forgo
knowing that youre loved no matter what
and everything will come around
in time

i own my insecurities
i try to own my destiny
that i can make or break it if i choose
but you take my words and twist them round
till im the one who brings you down
make me feel like im the one to blame
for all of this

you need everybody with you on your side
know that i am here for you but i hope in time
youll find yourself alright alone
youll find yourself with open arms
youll find yourself youll find yourself in time
--perfect girl by sarah mclachlan

sewanee.
i miss so many people from sewanee and it troubles me that i won't be able to see them in another month. we are done. we have graduated. we are not going back to each other.

work.
i started a job as the lead teacher in a 3-4 year old classroom last week. the kids are bad. real bad. i am slowly getting them straightened out. but i interviewed for another job on thursday and will probably get a call offering me a position tomorrow. the new job would be with MR, autism, adhd, tourette's, etc. the company is expanding and as i understand it, i could be moving up into a supervisor position as soon as three months down the road.

exercise.
i need to get back into mountain biking. my knee has healed as much as it is going to and i feel like biking could do me some good.

election.
john kerry's speech was impeccable. hulon, brian, and i went to a democratic convention party and had a blast. i was interviewed by the chattanooga newspaper. my picture is on the front page with quotes and everything. how exciting. i love being an activist. i cannot explain how it makes me feel...

i just found out that mitch will be here on wednesday. we leave thursday for pensacola. ethan flies in on friday. and i get to hang out with josette...the girl that i met for a reason, without a doubt. but i have yet to find out why.

until i am so moved again...